Monday, November 26

How To Outsmart Cyber Monday Like A Boss

Despite hours of prowling, gift guide making and the promise of cute shopping bags to make carrying recycling downstairs that much less annoying, I couldn't get in the moolah-blowin' mood for this year's Black Friday. Instead of going to the Aritzia across town or frantically hunting down that Elin Kling sweater on the phone, I just ate a lot of peanut butter-filled pretzel nuggets and didn't move for ten hours, much to my family's car-key-controlling enjoyment.

But, that's all changed now. After a four-hour marathon of Extreme Couponing I inadvertently got glued to yesterday afternoon, I'm in it to fucking win it. I'll never take home four pallets of cheapy dog food or collect diapers in my basement despite having no prospect of popping out a child anytime soon, but I will go crazy for travel-sized bottles of Bumble & Bumble favorites.

Considering their insane Cyber Monday deal and the lack of shipping minimums, I devised a lil' plan to get a stock of travel-sized goodies for only six bucks. Besides those three below, you get six other minis, including a Thickening Hairspray sample and a small vial of one of my new favorites, Hairdressers Invisible Oil. Basically, you're paying a handful of bucks for the best intro kit ever to their fabulous mane treatments, and a gym bag on par with the ones you're always envious of. Let's do this:

(Note: The 2oz bottle of Prep is backordered, so if you want your spritzes now-now, order the tea tree-oil infused Tonic for $7 instead.)

Not in the need to stock your carry-on before heading home for the Holidays? Here's other places to buy shit if hair detangler isn't really your prerogative:

Opening Ceremony - 20% off full-priced Outerwear with code: GETCOZY

That fluffy grape-colored Versace Versus coat and Kenzo floof are still impossible to afford for any of us normals, but if you're sitting on a pile of hundreds and happen to be chilly, I suggest those two options.

(Versace Versus Long Goat Hair Coat was $3445, now $2756; Kenzo Faux Fur Coat was $905; now $724)

K/LLER Collection - 20% off everything with code: gobblegobble

I've been obsessed with their metalwork since writing about them earlier this year, and have been waiting to purchase my first piece. Today, bank account be damned, will be that day. I'd pull more of my favorites like this and this, but they pretty much own the jewelry portion of tomorrow's Awkward City Gift Guide, so hop to it before then, sonny boy.

(Brass Stalactite Earrings was $131, now $105; Blackened Brass Stalactite Cuff was $119, now $95)

Madewell — 25% off everything & free shipping with code TREAT

The entire store! The entire everything! Flashes of the holiday episode of Extreme Couponing came back to me the entire time, but for real people, this one's a deal. (And I'm a JEW.) The discount's also going on in-store, which is singlehandedly to blame for me spending a guilt-ridden amount on a pair of brown big girl boots and a go-to sweater, slowly moving their way to the front of my closet as we speak. Sure, my lopsided feet mean I'm going to have to break them in and grow blisters like crystals in a dark cavern, but hey, they look great with dresses and my mom won't tell me they look like "those boots from the Holocaust museum" like my regular, disheveled lace-up pair.

(Yellow Owl Workshop Je T'aime Necklace was $44 now $33; Mohair Mix Sweater was $98, now $74)

Enjoy, folks! And remember: this is practically your reward for not being the type of person to eat Thanksgiving dinner outside of a WalMart while waiting for sales to start. Dig in!


Chelsea said...

gahhhh didn't work at 10:30-ish PM PST for me in CA damnit. They even still have ads running for the code online. PISSSSSSED!! I wanna be an extreme couponer!!

Carlye Wisel said...

Oh no!!! Mega bummer! It seems like their regular holiday code gives you some freebies too, so maybe that's an option? Sorry homie! D:

Thomas Braylen said...

Most people that finally enter into the actual shop don't get precisely what these folks were looking for. The particular offers search way too beneficial being correct, in addition to in case you are not really one of many very first persons in the shop you'll have got a hard time acquiring among those Cyber Monday laptop deals.

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