I've spent the majority of the past four days slaving away at taxes in my living room. I've taken to such extreme measures of boredom that not only did I begin watching Season 1, Episode 1 of Fraiser because I'm caught up on *every sitcom on television*, but my eyeballs are burning from extreme screen time staring at an endless Google Spreadsheets window wherein I reinforce how very, very without money I am when I write off a $1.29 app downloaded from iTunes back in February of 2014.
It's a sad, sad showcase, especially when Moda Operandi is touting their newest season wares all over every social outcry on the web. I successfully avoided their shop-o-rama until a friend sent me the retail price for their much-Instagrammed headphones — a bonkers $7095 — and I found myself in a downward spiral, dropping my jaw at kill-yourself good lipstick heels and ridiculous arts and crafts dresses.
But, the Dolce & Gabbana look that unhinged me most from reality was this insane-o white doodle gown shown near the end of the show:
Yeah, ok, it's a bit much — even without the $8,995 price tag — but can you imagine if this was on the shelf when I was shopping for a wedding dress?! I almost could have made an excuse to buy it. Sure, I'd still be sitting here, on the carpet, writing off $4.55 of Post-Its from Staples because I'm bad at saving money and even worse at keeping track of it, but what a dream it would be to wear a doodle dress in all of my photos and terrify every living relative in the process. I know, that's not what weddings are about, but until I find some other reason to justify this get-up, I'll be sitting here, writing off dollar by dollar, dreaming of how I can afford that gown.